Tell People What You're Working On... For Accountability and Support
+ That time my coach told me I wasn't ready to compete!
Hello, Friend! Happy Tuesday!
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In my life I have been hesitant to tell people, or even admit to myself, that I was or wanted to work towards a certain goal.
I remember when I first was thinking about doing a CrossFit Competition. I had been working out at the gym for maybe 6 months or so, knew of a competition that had just been publicized, but didn’t know if I was ready or how I would do. After some deliberation, I decided that I wanted to sign up, would work on the movements and workouts that were in the competition, and didn’t care if I got last (because in my mind that was the worst that could happen). I told my coach at the time that I wanted to do it… he said he didn’t think I was ready. LOL. Greattttttttttttttttt. True story. I did it anyway, did relatively well, and competed at CrossFit—sometimes at pretty high levels— for years after that!
Why was I hesitant to tell anyone about my goal in the first place?? Because it I told someone, or wrote it down, or even thought about it too much, then I could fail at it.
Instead I sometimes would just secretly work on things without telling anyone and then if I somehow was successful, it’d be like wow, look at how skilled I am that I can just DO that thing without even trying! When really I’d been working on things in secret the whole time!
Equally, if no one ever knew what I was working on, I couldn’t fail because the goal never existed! Ta da!! The magic way to avoid failure forever!!
And, sure, that strategy CAN work.
At the same time, however, that also leads to lackluster commitment, unclear goals, and zero support.
Sharing your goals, updating when progress is met, and leaning on others for accountability and support can be hugely beneficial! When this happens, at least one thing is true… you’ve committed to the goal enough to say it out loud!
If there’s something in your mind that you’ve been wanting to work on for a while now (this could also be a new habit you want to adopt, or one you want to break, etc.) take some time to see if it’s something you’d reallyyyy like to work on.
If it is, I encourage you to lay it all out… what is the thing you actually want to do? Why is that important to you? How will it benefit you? What will it look like as part of your life? How will you prepare for it? And so on.
Then… TELL SOMEONE ABOUT IT. Find a friend, family member, colleague, coach, relative, etc. who you trust and feel comfortable being somewhat vulnerable with and share the thing! I’d be willing to bet that this person will be proud of you for sharing, maybe can offer suggestions, and will provide motivation and encouragement as you work on it. (If they’re not supportive, you may have picked the wrong person to tell! That, or the goal is too extreme or unhealthy and they don’t feel comfortable supporting you, which is fair!)
If you’re feeling extra bold, you might even consider posting something about your goal or your process on social media. This can definitely be a way to hold yourself accountable, and many people find support and motivation from online communities with similar interests. You might even inspire others to do something similar!
You might also consider setting up check points for yourself to celebrate! For example, if your goal is to add 3 days of workouts per week, you might celebrate when you’ve done that each week for a month!
There might also be check points where you consider upping the effort. After that month, do you think 3 days of workouts is too easy, just right, or too much? Adjust as needed!
This might not always be the case, but I imagine at least some of the time we’ll want these goals to be adopted into our lives for the foreseeable future (as opposed to something like training for a 5k that’s next month and then you’re done.). If that long term approach is the case, then it’s important to focus on consistency with your effort. It's not just about starting strong, but also about maintaining the momentum over time. Consistency leads to long-term success. I saw a post the other day that said something like, “Do the simple things exceedingly well.” and that’s the kind of vibe we’re going for. Not that the things you’re picking are simple, but that they need to be “simple” enough to fit into our lives on a regular basis so that we can benefit from them long term… I hope this makes sense.
I really do understand, from personal experience and in working with clients on their nutrition and fitness, that it’s scary to commit to a goal. Or that we think we can do it without anyone’s help. And you might be able to. But it also might make it easier to lean on others.
If your goals involve fitness or nutrition, I can help. I’d be happy to be that person for you. Even if it’s just to listen! But I’m also pretty decent at the accountability, education, and support part of things too! ; )
Please reach out if it would be helpful to talk out any of the things you’re working on!
As always, thank you for reading!
xoxo,
Sara