Trying Everything and Still Struggling to Lose Weight? Read this post!
+ a short book review on "I'm Glad My Mom Died"
Hello, Friend! Happy Tuesday!
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Sometimes it feels like were doing everything, believe we’re eating nutritionally dense and healthy foods, working out, and trying hard to lose weight but it just doesn’t happen!
If this is true for you, it might be time to dig deeper and check in on the bigger picture. This blog post is about how to do that.
As you likely know, there are many factors involved in body composition: stress, sleep, metabolic health, lifestyle, social environment, etc. All of those matter for weight loss.
Before we dive into those things, first thing’s first. When you say you’re not losing weight, what timeline are we talking about? And are you sure you’re not exaggerating?
Hear me out.
Sometimes people say they’re not losing weight and what they mean is it’s been a week that they haven’t seen changes on the scale. Or they actually are losing weight, it’s just small amounts which they’ve deemed unremarkable.
We’ve gotta get perspective on this. As much a we want it to be different, weight loss and body composition change is a slowwwww process, and a week without change, or small changes, are NORMAL. So, before you jump to the conclusion that you’re not making progress, make sure it’s been longer than 2 weeks of real, consistent effort without seeing ANY changes. If you haven’t actually been consistent with your efforts for at least 2+ weeks, start there. If you’ve done that, then we can dive into the rest of this.
If you’re not already, finding a way to record your food for a few days can be super helpful. You can write it down, use an app, whatever works for you. But this process will allow you to get real with what you’re consuming. Sometimes we think we’re eating well and hitting all of our intake targets, and then when we look at it, we realize that there are places we can make adjustments that speak more towards our goals. Do that.
Then, SLEEP. Are you getting 7-9 hours? If not, make adjustments to get as close to that as possible! Quality sleep leads to physical recovery, digestion, and less stress. Not to mention how a lack of sleep impacts your hunger and fullness hormones if you’re not getting enough.
Yes, I know that sometimes we have extenuating circumstances that really do impact sleep, but I also know that sometimes we just stay up too late watching shows or doing other activities when we could be sleeping. For some reason, sleep is also something that a lot of people simply brush off as impossible to make adjustments around. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve worked with who tell me they don’t sleep enough, or that their sleep quality is poor, but that they’re also completely unwilling to try harder at it. This is frustrating because sleep is so so so important for your goals, especiallyyyyy if their weight loss related.
I know that I’m SUPER lucky in having a baby who is almost 3 months old and is currently on a 21-night streak of sleeping all the way through the night. Like from 8:30-9ish pm to 6:30-8ish am. Maybe it’ll come back to bite me at some point, but I also know how much I value sleep and even when she was getting up in the middle of the night to eat, I was doing my best to get as much as I could. Here’s my sleep from last night:
I don’t share this to brag—okay, maybe just a little!— but I share this to say that even with some extenuating circumstances, it’s likely possible to try harder to get your sleep! Little bits better WILL pay off with your body composition goals.
Next thing. Aside from your actual weight on the scale, what other changes are you seeing and measuring? I always recommend having at least one other metric aside from the scale to track regularly and gage progress with. This could be things like how your clothes are fitting, body composition shifts you see with photos or measurements, better performance in workouts, increases in energy, etc. Pick at least one other thing you care about that and start tracking that too. Many times weight on the scale is the last thing to show progress, and body composition shifts can be happening without weight actually changing. So, when people are able to celebrate changes they see elsewhere, that keeps them working toward their goals. Equally, I’d be willing to bet you care more about how things look than the actual number on the scale. So, make sure you have other metrics in play.
Next. How stressed are you?
If you find yourself getting very stressed on a regular basis, and especially if you turn to food as a coping mechanism, it’s time to put pieces into place to decrease stress for the sake of your mental health. Increased cortisol, our stress hormone, can also negatively impact your weight loss goals.
Need help de-stressing? Could you try a breathing practice? I love the Wim Hof Method and use his app to breathe 3x/week.
Could you try a journaling exercise? Write/type out all the things you’re thinking and feeling… just a completely brain dump. Many times an exercise like this can get the thoughts out of our heads and onto paper so we can think clearly again, without the stress weighing on us.
If those don’t help, it might be time to look at your lifestyle, job, daily routine, etc. to see what areas might be adding stress to your life that you might be able to adjust. “They” say that you’re the product of the 5 people you spend the most time with. If that’s the case, are those people adding to your stress?! It’s not comfortable to think about shifting relationships, but if your life, happiness, and goals depend on it, consider making those shifts where possible, too.
With some of these things in mind, I invite you first to get real on your progress. Bring in those other data points to get a bigger picture on your progress, understand weight loss is a slow process which takes time! Then, make sure your sleep, stress, and reality of your food intake are in check! I imagine this combination of things will help move your weight loss journey along, and benefit your overall health in the meantime!
(As always, if you want guidance through some of the points above, my work coaching people in the Nutrition For Life Project Course takes a look at stressors and all of the “real life” pieces that can impact our physical composition. Message me today to learn more at sara@nutritionforlifeproject.com! Or, check out my new eBook which includes loads of content along these lines!)
+ A Mini Book Review
Since my post from last week reviewing the book Atomic Habits by James Clear got lots of views, I want to share this book I just finished here too in case this kind of content is interesting to you.
So, I just finished listening to I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jeanette McCurdy. And holy shit. This book hit me right in the feels.
Jeanette McCurdy was a child actor, who you may know from Nickelodeon shows like iCarly. I’ve never seen a single show she’s been in, and I assure you, you don’t need to have seen her act to be impacted by this book.
She’s an amazing writer and storyteller, and she reads the audiobook version if you’re into that kind of thing.
Anyway, the book recounts Jeanette’s childhood and the abusive and troubled relationship she had with her mother—that she wasn’t aware was abusive at the time.
Much of the book and what her mom did was extremely troubling, but some of the most troubling was the ideas that her mom instilled in Jeannette around food. She introduced her to calorie restriction at age 8 with the goal of pushing off development and growth into adulthood. She had her weighing herself 5 times a day. They would eat only sugar-free popsicles and split the occasional Lean Cuisine meals. While her mom was unconscious on her deathbed, Jeanette told her that she hit her goal weight of 89 pounds (as a 17 year old!), convinced that that fact would help wake her mom up.
As you can imagine, these kinds of behaviors led to extremely unhealthy relationships with food for Jeanette, including anorexia and bulimia, and later alcoholism. While I believe her mom had undiagnosed mental health issues herself, and this is an extreme example of parents influencing their children about food, it’s worth remembering how our words and actions impact those around us. Thankfully, the book also discusses some of Jeanette’s experiences in therapy, healing, and making necessary changes in her life to regain her health and happiness.
While this recounting of her experiences is upsetting, McCurdy is also an incredible storyteller, is so witty, and, as long as you can handle listening to it yourself as the content is tough and potentially triggering, I highly recommend reading or listening to this memoir.
If you’ve read it, I’d love to hear your thoughts. And, if you have other book recommendations, please let me know! Share in the comments or send me an email!
As always, thank you for reading!
xoxo,
Sara